Expelling Children

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It’s easy to be jaded when it comes to the Youth of Today. With reports of drug abuse, petty crime, tagging and gang violence bombarding us from all angles, one can lose sight of the good kids.

I spent a lot of time on the bus today. Shortly after boarding I heard a sneeze come from the back of the bus. A young mother and her daughter, a talkative young lady I would surmise to be about four, said “Bless you!”

No response came from the back of the bus. The little girl looked me square in the eye and said, “Bless you!”

“Thank you,” I replied. “I didn’t sneeze, but good manners should always be rewarded.”

This of course made the young girl very proud, and the conversation continued in that vein. “Mommy? What do I say when people cough?”

“You don’t say anything when other people cough. What do you say when *you* cough?”

The little girl thought for a second, and looked over at me. I casually covered my mouth, coughed and said “Excuse me.”

“You cover your mouth and say excuse me!” she proclaimed.

“Very good!”

After they got off, another young mother got on. She had a baby in a Cadillac-sized stroller, and a little boy about five. He was also gregarious, looking out windows, engaging passengers in conversation. Somehow he signaled mom, she got up and went to the front of the bus. She disengaged the garbage bucket next to the door, brought it back and handed it to the kid sitting right in front of me.

“Is he okay?” asked the driver. “Because if he gets sick on the bus-”

BLARFFF!

“-we’ll have to exchange buses.”

The kid hit the bucket with the seasoned practice of an alcoholic morning drinker. The driver looked back in disgust.

“At least he got it all in the bucket, ” I said, before the driver could call dispatch. The bus had pulled over. The driver saw all was well, mom brought the offending mess to the front. There was no discernible smell. The last time I saw a kid puke on a bus, it smelled like a mixture of SpaghettiOs and moldy cat poop.

The driver said, “Just throw everything in the garbage over there. Remember, that’s my last spare garbage can, so let me know if he starts feeling ill again. We can pull over.”

Mom opened windows, the kid sat on his knees in front of his, and the rest of the ride came off without a hitch. On his way out the door, the little man said, “Thank you Mister Bus Driver. Sorry I throwed up.”

“That’s okay, things happen. You have a nice day,” said the driver.

There is hope for tomorrow’s youth. We can put off the end of the world for at least a couple more decades.

One Response to “ Expelling Children ”

  1. Good one Charlie.

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